Horsemen Moments
by Bella Mortis
Summary: While reuniting, the Horsemen have some...er, moments. Drabbles.
1. Just a Bit Out of Date

Just a Bit Out of Date

Obligatory Disclaimer and Warnings: Methos, Kronos, and Silas belong to D/P. No warnings.

Three horsemen had been reunited. They were on their way to collect the forth.

"Wow! All the buildings are so big!" Silas was so engrossed in the landscape, that he walked straight into the street. Breaks squealed as a car stopped just in time. The irate driver honked his horn, and muffled strains of Russian curses could be heard. Silas blinked, astounded, as Methos and Kronos came over and led him onto the walk. 

"The cars sure are different, too," he said, grinning wide.

Methos just looked at the giant. "Exactly how long were you living in the woods again?"


	2. Together Again

Together Again

Obligatory Disclaimer and Warnings: Methos, Kronos, Silas, and Caspian belong to D/P. No warnings.

Finally, after nearly three millennia, the four horsemen were back together. Leaving the mental institution, they traveled to Bordeaux in Methos' SUV, Kronos and Methos alternating driving since they were obviously the only ones who could. That left Silas and Caspian in the back seat. 

"He crossed the line!" Well, Silas _was_ huge.

"He tried to bite my hand!" Well, Caspian _was_ a cannibal.

By the time they reached the edge of France, Methos felt like he would need a holiday in a mental institution himself. Kronos, though, just looked extremely amused.

"Just like the good old days, eh, brother?"


	3. Escape

Escape

Obligatory Disclaimer and Warnings: Methos, Kronos, Silas, and Caspian belong to D/P. I'm not sure about the monkey, but I guess they'd probably own it, too (just to be on the safe side). No warnings.

To Neoinean - Of course they had lighter moments! Even millennia old apocalyptic figures can't be dark _all _the time. Also, I do have plans on continuing, as you can see. Basically, parts will be added as I think them up. ^^ 

Loaded down with carry-out, Methos strolled back into the Horsemen's new headquarters, and into a literal madhouse. He stopped just inside the entrance to the main room to take in the scene. 

The sparse, heavy metal table and chairs lay overturned, and what had been a nice, tidy pile of trash in the corner had been strewn about. Through this ran a loudly screeching, wild-eyed monkey, followed by three yelling, wild-eyed Immortals threateningly brandishing swords. Methos just watched, wide-eyed and disbelieving as they continued to careen around, each sword swipe just missing the primate.

"Bloody hell, not again," he muttered. 


	4. A New Pet

A New Pet

Obligatory Disclaimer and warnings: Methos, Kronos, Silas, and Caspian belong to D/P. Warnings, hmm…stereotypes? Death? *shrug*

Author's notes: Yes, this is a longer chapter, but that's only because it was actually really, _really_ hard to fit all the stuff I wanted to into one hundred words. So, in effect, I present to you this triple drabble. Three hundred beautiful words…such pretty words…

To Reviewers: 

Neoinean: Well, all I can say is that your review gave me inspiration for this. Enjoy. ^^

DogFire2084: Hey, friend. ^^ Hehe…better get that chair fixed…Did you know that most fatal accidents occur in the home? It'd be horridly embarrassing to die by chair, I think. 

It was a calm night in the submarine base that served as the reunited Horsemen's headquarters. Kronos was back in the highly secure laboratory doing who-knows-what with his new primate acquisitions. Caspian was sitting in one of the iron wrought chairs surrounding the iron wrought table, surprisingly acquiescent and reading one of Methos' books. Methos sat in one of the other chairs, his eyes on Silas and _his_ new primate acquisition.

The poor chimp, naturally, was being taught a few tricks by the giant man. Currently, the chimp was wobbling around on a unicycle - despite the giant gash where one of the immortals had brained it to take it down - while dressed in the traditional vest and fez, all gotten from who-knows-where. 

Silas grinned up at Methos when the chimp finally fell, as it had been doomed to from the start. "Look, brother! A whole thirty seconds this time."

"Nice," commented Methos, looking down at the chimp with pity. Then he noticed it wasn't moving. "Say, maybe you should check if it's okay."

Silas did as suggested, then sighed. "Dead as a doornail," he said sadly, pulling the hat and vest off the furry corpse with a somber air. 

It was at this time that Kronos walked into the main room, a gleam of satisfaction in his eyes. It dulled to a sort of sympathetic gleam when he saw Silas' dead chimp. "You really should be more careful with your toys, brother," he said roughly, his tone expressing his condolences.

"Poor thing." Silas picked up the little corpse and took it to a back room where all Kronos' failed experiments went. When he came back, there was a smile on his big face. "Well, there's always the next escapee."

Methos and Kronos looked at each other and sighed. 


	5. Whilst Shopping

Whilst Shopping…

Obligatory Disclaimer and Warnings: Methos and Caspian belong to D/P. No warnings.

Author Notes: Yep, back to normal drabbles…pretty normal drabbles…

"How about that one?" The woman was extremely cosmopolitan - thin, blonde, tan, and dressed to the nines, showing off legs that seemed to stretch to her chin. 

The other didn't even look. "No."

"_That_ one? I mean, just look at those hips. And that chest! Why, it's to die for." The brunette was curvy and pretty, but sort of plain. One of those sports types.

"_No_"

"Okay, so that's not your thing. How about that schoolgirl over there? She's a bit scrawny, but -"

Methos sighed. "For the last time, Caspian, no. We're not having someone over for dinner."


	6. Just a Friendly Game

Just a Friendly Game

Obligatory Disclaimer and Warnings: Caspian and Silas belong to D/P. No warnings.

To Reviewers:

katfairy: Thank you. You gotta love a cannibal's idea of "shopping".

Neoinean: Woo hoo! I'm forgiven! I feel all warm and fuzzy…wait, that might just be the caffeine speaking. ^^ Anyway, I'm tickled pink that you're still enjoying this. Repeat reviewers are the best. 

daughter1: I'm glad you're enjoying it. I try. I really, really do, you know. 

Dogfire2084: Well, holy rusted, dilapidated, goldfish-like metal, Batman! God has a heart for monkeys - probably more so than Death. Wait, make that definitely more so than Death. *snigger* 

It was a heated confrontation, with both Immortals staring one another down with distrust and an odd sort of hatred in their eyes. Both, shockingly, held no weapons. Instead, both merely held a small, fan-shaped selection of cards, for cards were their weapons and the heavy set, iron wrought table between them their battlefield. 

It was Caspian who broke first, his slightly crazed eyes flicking down to his hands. Then they flicked back up, the shiny gleam of some dark emotion replacing the hatred. "Twos?" he asked gruffly, glaring.

Silas looked, then gave a wide, toothy grin. "No, go fish." 


	7. Flashback Fun 1: On Boredom and It's Whi...

Flash-back Fun: On Boredom and It's Whimsical Solutions

Obligatory Disclaimer and Warnings: Methos, Kronos, Silas, and Caspian belong to D/P. No warnings.

Author's Note: Despite all appearances, I did not fall off the face of the earth. Per usual, life interfered with writing. Anyway, I'm back, and, in apology for this dear little story's neglect, I bring to you a triple drabble. (Okay, it's not an apology. It's because my fingers ran away with me until 200 words after the 100th…)

Somewhere in the Mediterranean,

2006 B.C.

It was just another normal, uneventful day in the pottery shop. In the back room, Methos sighed as he threw yet another of the red earthen wine pitchers that had been selling like hotcakes for the past month. He looked over to his business partner, Kronos, who was carefully painting a scene along the edge of an already fired plate, tongue hanging out of his mouth in concentration.

"You know, we've been doing this day in and day out for the good part of three centuries," he muttered just loud enough for his compatriot to hear. "I'm starting to get sick of even the sight of pottery."

Kronos finished adding a flourish to the elegant black Minotaur before looking up, a slight smirk on his face. "Oh, you are, are you?" he replied contritely. "Pottery just not…doing it for you anymore, eh?"

Methos glared at the other Immortal. "It's just getting boring, is all. Must be one of those…what did you call them? 'Midlife crises'?"

Kronos nodded, setting the unfinished plate down and turning to Methos with wildly glowing eyes. "Well, the boys and I have had this plan in the works for some time now…"

As Kronos talked, Methos' initial glare slowly faded into an expression of wonder and excitement. It wasn't long before he caved, agreeing with relish. After all, the idea made his already centuries old blood roil with a near forgotten fire.

A victorious smile on his face, Kronos stood and walked to the doorway leading to the front of the shop. "Silas! Caspian!" he cried to the two Immortals manning the shop counter. "He finally cracked! Operation 'Midlife Crisis', phase two, starts tonight!"

And, henceforth, terror reigned over the known world for a millennia.


End file.
